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WHAT WILL YOU MISS MOST OF THE THINGS RUSH DID TO MAKE YOU HAPPY?
Now that the "new and improved version" of the remade and rehabilitated Mumbo Jumbo has supplanted the good old Rush that we all had known and "loved"; what will you miss most?
Rush used to go out of his way to make us 'happy', but now that he has 'taken the cure' he is determined to remain 'drug free' by pleasing himself instead of 'others'. Rush indicates that his descent into the sordid and self-absorbed world of Hillbilly Heroin addiction was fueled by a 'self-loathing' borne of a over-reaching need to make us happy.
It would only be right that after so much happiness granted us by the magnanimous Mumbo Jumbo, we should be willing to give it up for the benefit of our benefactor. In keeping with that sentiment this is a little list of 'happy things' that Rush did for me that I am willing to do without:
1.) Staying out of Jail as a self-confessed drug addicted felon.Let's all send Rush the message that we are willing to sacrifice the happiness he has brought to us. Let Rush know what you are willing to do without to aid him in his recovery. He may become a self-centered self-righteous bigot instead of the loving and caring beacon of joy we have come to know and love. Let Rush know that you support him. Tell Rush about the happiness you are willing to do without in the comment section.
Now that Rush is determined to please himself he should be free to 'go to jail' as he has suggested all drug offenders should.
2.) Blaming almost everything on the Clinton's
This is a tough one because the happiness Rush delivered while blaming everything on the Clinton's will leave him with so little to talk about
3.) Blaming everything else on Liberals
Rush made so many of us happy by explaining that everything is the fault of Clinton's or Liberals. Giving this up will be a shock to the national psyche but it is time to let Rush focus on his own happiness instead of ours.
4.) That $285 million dollar broadcasting contract.
It will be sad to see it go but you gotta do what you gotta do Rush - go ahead and give it up.
5.) The $24 million dollar Palm Beach mansion
The big mansion is a source of joy for 'dittoheads' from coast to coast but you come first Rush and the burden of so much wealth and such a large estate is too dear a price to pay for the happiness of others.
6.) Those ridiculous book contracts.
Rush writing will sorely be missed but his happiness is threatened by those lucrative book deals.
7) Golf and cigars
Seeing Rush swing those clubs in synch with that huge cigar reminded us of Monica's posterior and put a smile on many faces with every image. Rush you have our blessing to lay down the clubs and the stogies.
SUPPORT RUSH IN HIS TIME OF NEED: JOIN THE "DRUGS FOR RUSH" CAMPAIGN
From the Left:
SouthKnoxBubba __ another Mission Accomplished and the must read GOP Bizarro World Politics
Skippy the Bush Kangaroo ___ the CGI President and Culture Clashing with the Facts
Ruminate This ___ AARP; Just Another Insurance Agency and Another Vain and Vindictive Run