Sep 16, 2008

10 REASONS TO ELECT McBUSH and Pinnochio Palin

As someday it may happen that a victim must be found
I've got a little list

Some days you just have to do something silly to keep from tearing your hair out.
I don't watch much Letteman but I am a fan of his lists
so with apologies to David here are mine

Please help out by adding your improvements via the comment section

10 Most Viable reasons to elect Pinnochio Palin Vice-President

10. She’s a terrific role model for abstinence only sex education

9. She is already very competent in hiding her administration’s e-mail from public view and will require no instruction from Dick Cheney

8. She will put Air Force Two on eBay and when it fails to sell she will offer it through a broker at a loss so McSame can claim she sold it on eBay for a profit

7. She will eliminate any moose or polar bear infestation in Washington DC

6. She will reduce the clutter in the Library of Congress by offering a list of books to be removed

5. She will fight pork by removing bacon from all government operated cafeterias.

4. She will streamline the various departments in Washington and reduce the size of government by firing those who refuse to fire anyone who disagrees with her.

3. She will improve the museum of natural history and cut costs by moving the dinosaur display in with the Neanderthals.

2. She will hunt down Democratic Congressmen using airplanes and helicopters and offer a $150 bounty on their limbs.

1. She will have a totally fresh outlook on foreign policy if she becomes President unfettered by any previously held knowledge or belief.

10 Best Reasons to elect John Sidney McSame

10. He chose the most qualified person in the world to be his VP

9. His wife Cindy has more experience than anyone in decorating new houses

8. His economy is on solid ground - even if ours sucks

7. He will enter his VP in the Miss Buffalo Chip contest

6. He will reform Washington so it looks like it did back in the good old days of George W Bush or Herbert Hoover

5. He can bail out Lehman Brothers with his own (Cindy’s) money

4. He won’t have to use Camp David or Air Force One since he has better places to stay and his own jet.

3. He has 159 Hogs on his campaign staff who will bring enough pork to Washington to eliminate the need for more

2. He will revitalize the drilling industry in your back yard and use the holes to store nuclear waste.

1. He will attack Russia, bomb bomb bomb bomb Iran, and stay in Iraq for 100 years after following Osama bin Ladin to the gates of Hell so cable news ratings could skyrocket if anyone is left with enough money to pay for cable.
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